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In Loving Memory of Henry London, Jr.

January 10, 2019 Leave a comment
henry at family gathering

Henry London, Jr. at Family Gathering

On Monday, January 7, 2019 my family lost one of our beloved family members – Henry London, Jr. He is very dear to our hearts. You see, my cousin was “wrongfully shot” by police officers in 1972. A place was being robbed, he picked up the phone to call the police to report it, the police came to the scene and shot the wrong person.

From that shooting, Henry was paralyzed from the waist down – to never walk again. After the shooting, he lived a productive and love-filled life. He had some medical challenges throughout the years, but he would always come out successfully. He was one of the first people in Baton Rouge, La to have van designed for paralyzed drivers. He was a father and grandfather. He touched so many different lives  (family and a host of friends) with his encouragement, correction, laughter and love. At times, I would spend hours talking with him when I went over to visit.

On Sunday, January 6, 2019 he took sick at home and was rushed to the hospital. It was discovered that his body had an infection. He fought a good fight. When we visited him Monday in the hospital he wasn’t awake, but when his mother began talking to him, he responded with body movements, as best he could. He would do the same type of response when his close friends came and would talk to him. Amazing!!!

Henry lived an additional “47 Years” after the police shooting that left him paralyzed.

His Celebration of Life Ceremony will be Saturday, January 12, 2019 at 10am at the Mt. Pilgrim Baptist Church in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

We need your prayers as we welcome traveling family members and as we greet community members and friends who are calling and stopping by offering their condolences.

Thank you your prayers.

Minister Ginger London

henry at game   lil henry

 

 

 

Patience Day 30 -Reflect On How Far You’ve Come And Where To Go From Here

September 18, 2018 Leave a comment
close up photography of bulb on water

Reflect Back Over The Last 30 Days

Let’s take a quick walk down memory lane and browse through all the different topics we covered over the past 29 days. Here’s a quick rundown:

1. Welcome And How Patient Are You?
2. What Exactly Is Patience?
3. The Importance Of Becoming A More Patient Person
4. Patience Is A Skill – Practice Helps
5. Quick Patience Tip – Count To Ten
6. Patience Is A Virtue! Or Is It?
7. 5 Signs That You’re An Impatient Person
8. Get In The Habit Of Realizing When Patience Is In Order (Part 1)
9. Get In The Habit Of Realizing When Patience Is In Order (Part 2)
10. Reflect On When You’ve Been Too Impatient
11. Times To Be Patient vs. Times To Act
12. Using Visualization Exercises To Help With Patience
13. 3 Things You Must Do After An Impatient Outburst
14. The Physical Side Of Impatience
15. The Physical Side Of Impatience
16. Create Awareness About Losing Your Patience
17. Pinpoint What’s Causing You To Lose Your Cool
18. How To Avoid Emotional Explosion Infographic
19. Scriptures On Patience
20. Give Yourself A Time Out To Recoup Your Patience
21. Give Yourself A Time Out To Recoup Your Patience
22. Meditate Your Way To Patience
23. Why Do You Feel Rushed?
24. Build Cushions Into Your Daily Schedule To Make Time For Patience
25. Selah! – Rest Day
26. How Gratitude & Thankfulness Can Make You More Patient
27. Get Comfortable With Being Uncomfortable
28. It’s Ok To Act Patient Until You Develop It
29. Patience Is A Choice
30. Reflect On How Far You’ve Come And Where To Go From Here

We’ve reached the end of our journey. I can’t believe it! I hope this time together has been as enjoyable for you as it’s been for me. More than that, it’s my hope that you now feel you possess the information and tools you need to become a more patient person. We’ve covered a lot over the past month.

We started off our journey by defining patience and talking about why it’s important. Beginning with an understanding of the concept and a strong framework is necessary to continue learning. We then discovered some tangible tools and techniques to put in place in order to begin to demonstrate more patience and to calm down when you’re feeling frustrated.

It was early in our time together that I first introduced the idea that patience is a skill that can be learned. Because it’s so essential to the process, we re-visited the idea toward the end of our 30 days. It’s empowering to know that patience can be learned, practiced and improved upon. You aren’t a bad person or less worthy simply because patience doesn’t come easily to you.

In addition, we learned about some of the things that cause us to feel less patient. Personal triggers are a big problem for some of us. Knowing what triggers you is essential to overcoming it when you feel it happen. Feeling less rushed and more gratitude are also practices that can reduce your tendency to feel impatient.

Finally, we looked at your motivations to want to become more patient. These are all very personal to you. Knowing and acknowledging them can push you to move forward on your journey of learning ways to become more patient. Recognize that this won’t happen overnight. Bring out your list of reasons when you feel like giving up.

Assignment Day 30:

Take a few minutes today to reflect on not only how far you’ve come, but more importantly how this simple 30 day challenge has influenced you and changed you for the better.

What has had the biggest impact on you?

What tips and ideas have you found the most helpful? Those are the posts that you want to go back to again and again.

What positive experiences have you had as a result of the information you’ve gained?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Patience Day 29 -Patience Is A Choice

September 17, 2018 Leave a comment
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Patience Is A Choice!

In yesterday’s blog post, I talked to you about how patience isn’t an inherent quality you’re born with. It isn’t something you either have or don’t have. Patience is a skill that must be practiced and learned in order to be improved upon. The underlying point of this newfound knowledge is that becoming a more patient person will require a great deal of effort and work on your part. We’ve learned a lot of strategies in our journey together. You now have the tools to use to become a more patient person. You must first realize and believe that patience is a choice.

You Decide

You get to decide that you can increase your patience levels. First you must decide that you want to and that the effort is worth it. To help you in this endeavor, make a list. Write down the reasons why you wish to become more patience. Find patterns of where your life is being disrupted by your lack of patience. Knowing your “why” and your motivation to change will help you to become more committed to seeing it through.

What Do You Value?

Keep your list out because, you’re going to add to it. Take some notes about what it is you value with relation to patience. How would being seen as a patient person by others make a difference in your life? What are the values and benefits behind the things you wrote down in your first list? For instance, you may have said that you want to be a better parent by being more patient with your children. Expand on that to determine what is you value about being seen as a better parent and feeling like an accomplished parent. These answers could include the respect and love of your children, with less fear. They might also include a feeling of self-love and acceptance that would come when you feel confident in your ability to parent more patiently. Take notes and explore these values.

Make the Change

The insight you gain from these lists should be powerful information that serves as a catalyst for change. It is my hope and belief that you’ll feel more motivated, inspired and excited toward becoming a more patient person. You now have the tools and the desire to make change. You understand that the power rests within you and nobody else to become the kind of patient individual you wish to be. You’ve taken responsibility for your level of patience. In addition, you’re now armed and ready to do what it takes to become the person you wish to be in this regard.

It’s pretty empowering to realize that patience is a choice, isn’t it? I hope you’re ready to move forward with this knowledge and attitude to bring patience into your life.

 

 

 

 

Patience Day 28 -It’s Ok To Act Patience Until You Develop It

September 16, 2018 Leave a comment
person playing piano

It’s Okay To Practice Patience Until You Get It!

Surely, you’ve heard the phrase, “fake it ’til you make it.” I would rather say, “act it ‘til you develop it.” It refers to professing to have a quality you wish you possessed and believing that you’ll eventually get to a place in which you genuinely have that trait. Usually, some work is required behind the scenes in order to get to that place, as merely professing it alone won’t get the job done. However, it is possible to put on the appearance of a patient person until you start to gain genuine patience. This mind strategy can be quite helpful in reaching your ultimate goal. I’ll show you how it works.

Patience Can Be Learned

First of all, it’s important to remember that patience can be learned. It isn’t necessarily something that you’re born with. Some people appear to be, and that’s great for them. However, if you weren’t, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person nor does it mean you won’t ever become more patient. Patience is, in fact, a skill. Like any other, it requires practice to improve. Knowing this puts the keys in your hand. You have the power and control to take action that will result in you becoming more patient.

Change Your Attitude

A change of attitude is the beginning of seeing actual improvement. It’s the first step to seeing patience come more naturally to you. Part of this change is the realization that patience isn’t a stagnant, inherent quality. No longer should you think you were just born without much patience and that there’s nothing you can do to fix that. You’re not broken. You simply lack something you’d like more of. Usually when you want something in your life, you know you have to work and take strategic effort to get it. Same is true with patience.

Change Your Thoughts

Once you’ve refined your attitude, you can begin to reframe your thoughts. This process involves changing nagging, hostile thoughts into more reasonable ones. It’s part of the “fake it ’til you make it” bit. For example, if you’re in line and find yourself really annoyed by the customer who’s taking forever at the register, you may be likely to tell yourself how rude that guy is to be holding everyone up or that the cashier must not be very good at her job if she can’t move things a long a little faster. Chances are, neither of these things is true.

Instead, tell yourself a story that will help to increase your patience or one that will at least help the situation to become more tolerable. Maybe it would help to think that the customer is using all of those coupons to help feed his larger family and that he’s really smart to take the time to do that. Such a narrative with a positive spin can go far toward helping you to feel better.

Once you begin this practice, you’ll find it starts to become more natural. Soon you may not have to fake it at all.

 

 

 

Patience Day 27 -Get Comfortable With Being Uncomfortable

September 15, 2018 Leave a comment

Many of us find that we may be set in our ways. Rather than pursue a change we might desire, we stay stuck where we are. The reason behind this is that what we know, our current situation is usually more comfortable than the unknown. Facing the discomfort of pursuing something we don’t have control over can feel like just too much. The motives behind human behavior frequently lie in either the pursuit of what feels good or the avoidance of what doesn’t. Far too often, it’s the avoidance of pain or discomfort that wins out. Once you learn to get comfortable with being uncomfortable, you’ll find that more opportunities will open up to you. Let’s examine this concept.

Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence is a concept that very much relates to the ability to handle discomfort, so I’d like to introduce it here. It’s sort of like IQ, but this emotional IQ or EIQ focuses on the ability to regulate one’s emotions in a healthy manner. People with high emotional intelligence are able to handle uncertainty, react to distressing situations calmly and navigate the ups and downs of life on a generally even keel. If you struggle with emotional intelligence, you’re more apt to be reactive or explosive in nature, falling prey to the desire to minimize any discomfort immediately.

Avoiding Discomfort

The need to avoid discomfort is strong. It’s more powerful in some people than in others. If you tend to succumb to doing anything to avoid feeling bad, it’s likely this need has led you to make some unhealthy or negative choices. The feeling of discomfort doesn’t have to be a bad thing. It could be a warning sign that something needs to change and that you should take a particular action. The problem lies in the inability to sit with the feeling long enough to make a correct determination. Many of us simply react and give in to the negativity. We do whatever it takes to push away the feeling of discomfort.

Getting Comfortable with Discomfort

So, clearly, the trick lies in learning to accept being uncomfortable, at least long enough to come to a healthy conclusion about how to get rid of the feeling. There are some ways you can teach yourself to tolerate being uncomfortable. It does get easier with practice.

One way to begin your practice is to start with something that isn’t all that difficult for you. A small challenge is just the way to get a feeling for what it’s like to hold onto discomfort for a while and to show yourself you can move past it. For example, if you’ve been wanting to eat healthier, but can’t stand the taste of things like veggies and water, try to add one or two new healthful items to your menu each day. You’ll find you can overcome this far more easily than if you tried to overhaul your entire approach to eating. Add different tasks as you get comfortable with one, and you’ll find the process becomes less of a burden.

Also, pay attention to your emotions when you start to feel the discomfort. Take note of the sensations within your body and the thoughts racing through your mind. Knowing these triggers will help you to conquer them as you continue your practice.

Getting comfortable with being uncomfortable is a process that will take time and practice. It’s an essential step in the journey toward becoming a more patient person, and I think you’ll find it to be well worth your effort.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Patience Day 26 -How Gratitude & Thankfulness Can Make You More Patient

September 14, 2018 Leave a comment
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Gratitude implies a deep appreciation for something

You probably consider gratitude to be a positive personality trait. After all, someone who is thankful for what they have or what they are given seems to be much more pleasant than someone who is entitled or who doesn’t appreciate anything. However, being grateful has more benefits than simply making you a pleasant person to be around. In fact, gratitude and thankfulness can make you more patient. Join me as I explain more.

About Gratitude

Gratitude is a human emotion that is much like appreciation or thankfulness. Beyond its everyday use, the concept has begun to receive attention within the field of positive psychology. Gratitude has been linked to a number of positive benefits. In this context, it goes beyond just saying “thank you.” Gratitude implies a deep appreciation for something. There’s a saying that goes, “Gratitude is an attitude.” I like this one because it implies that being grateful is something that can be incorporated into your personality with intention. When you are purposefully grateful, wonderful things can happen.

Gratitude and Patience

Gratitude has a strong connection to patience because it’s been shown to improve self-control. When you’re feeling grateful, you’re more apt to be content in the moment, which gives you the ability to make more grounded decisions and to not look longingly to the next thing on your life. Gratitude has also been shown to reduce levels of depression, anxiety and stress. We’ve already talked about how being less stressed allows you to be more patient. Finally, gratitude also provides you with a deeper appreciation for what you have. When you apply this to your relationships, you’ll find yourself becoming far less impatient with the important people in your life.

How to Be More Grateful

Gratitude can be considered an emotion, a state of being or a character trait. I also think of it as a practice, something that gets better and comes easier with time. There are lots of ways you can practice gratitude and incorporate it into your life. Try keeping a gratitude journal. Writing down three to five things each day that you’re grateful for will change your outlook. You could also volunteer or become active in a cause. Helping others and working for something bigger than yourself is a great way to see the bigger picture and to gain perspective on what’s really important to you.

Another useful strategy is to turn your complaints into positives. Next time you’re feeling upset about something, try to find the silver lining. Listing just one thing can really turn things around for you.

There are many of other ways to practice gratitude. An internet search will give you several. Give these suggestions a try and take note of how you feel. You’re likely to find your patience increasing. Suddenly, minor annoyances will seem far less significant.

Assignment Day 26

Start a gratitude journal. For the next two weeks each day write down three to five things that you are grateful for. If you need to start slow, write down at least one thing.

 

 

 

 

Patience Day 25 -Selah Moments!- Rest Day

September 13, 2018 Leave a comment
high angle view of pencils on table

Think on These Things!

Today is a day of rest for you. There aren’t any blog posts to read or audios to listen to. Today I want to encourage you to have what I call “Selah” Moments. At different times throughout your day, find time to think on the things you have learned throughout this challenge.

Be sure to write down in your journal what you have learned about patience, any strategies you start using in your life now, and things you have discovered about yourself.

Okay, well that’s it for today.

Selah!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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