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Forgiveness – Why Is It So Difficult? Part 1

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When someone we love and trusted has treated us with disdain the last thing on our minds at first is forgiveness. Our dreams have been shattered and we usually become angry and want revenge. Forgiveness isn’t on the horizon.

If you’re infused with anger and resentment toward another person, your thoughts are likely full of negativity. You may also have guilt for how you contributed to the situation or think that forgiving is only for the weak – and you never want to forget the transgression so it will never happen again.

Being judgmental is also a reason why it’s so hard to forgive another. If you perceive the other person as not appreciating you or all you’ve done for them or the love and trust you’ve put in the relationship, it becomes even more difficult. You’re so disappointed by the other person’s behavior that you refuse to put it in the past.

It’s important to remember that forgiveness doesn’t automatically let the person off the hook for what they’ve done. Even if they apologize or make amends for the transgression, you may think they need to continue paying by being non-forgiving and casting them out of your life for good.

You can make the choice to forgive and still not reconcile or accept what they’ve done. But, when your harshness of judging begins to permeate your own life and make you bitter and resentful, forgiveness can be a gift that you give yourself so you can pick up the pieces and go on in a healthy manner.

 

 

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